Walking in Memphis, The Belfast Boyband, and Crocodile Tails
Business ideas and barbells
It was early January in 2005 when this idea was born. I had left university in 2004 and was working for a sales and marketing company In Belfast. Not just any sales and marketing company. We had music pumping from 6.30 am (starting time) and bells, high fives, and a lot of jumping around at 8 pm (end of the day). It was like the Wolf of Wall Street with less debauchery. (More on that story next month).
The amigos (Liam and Gerard) who play a huge part in this story were doing their own thing. We all trained together in a fitness club in Belfast and took real pride in maintaining a healthy physical state. Our backgrounds were in soccer, and we all played at a relatively good standard.
Given we spent a lot of time in the fitness environment we started talking about whether we could go into business for ourselves in this industry. But what could we develop, produce, and sell to customers? We had never started a business before, but that didn’t matter we were young and full of passion to get something off the ground.
At that time the use of hydraulic equipment was sweeping the U.S.A. through numerous franchise chains, and we thought, we can make this work in Ireland. The light bulb had arrived. Now put an extra 10kg on each side of that barbell and lift something!
Market research or painting by numbers?
We got a small office, some laptops, and furniture thanks to some enterprise funding for start-ups. Jesus, this felt good. We were ready for world domination. Can you start a business this quick? Absolutely, but it might not last long. Now, back to the products again. How do you select what you want to sell? How do you know it will sell? Where are you selling it? Who are you approaching first to pilot it? We came up with an idea of targeting small scale community organizations that had space to house the equipment and local boxing clubs. All sound solid?
However, we still hadn’t selected the equipment we wanted to sell to these organisations, so our strategy was well off track. After scanning the internet for manufacturers in the U.S.A that had a viable track record we selected one. No problems there either. We reached out via email then followed up with calls, articulating what we wanted to do.
This required using the mind tricks of a Jedi as we hadn’t got a clue what we were doing (but that’s how you learn). Wow, they want to meet with us to discuss how we take this forward. This was Belfast blagging at its finest! No problems there either. Just one. They were based in Memphis Tennessee!
Do we need to go to Memphis?
Wait. We are based in a small office in Belfast. How will we afford flights, accommodation, and subsistence? (Real priorities). The enterprise agency in Belfast had a research grant available for local start-ups with export potential. This was exactly what we needed. So, after speaking with the manufacturers, devising an itinerary, and costing flights and accommodation to Memphis we submitted our application. Incredible, it was accepted.
This would be our first mission together to meet with experienced business owners, so we needed to be well prepared. After looking at our notes from emails and phone conversations we started to build a picture of what might smooth our initial engagements with them. The owner was a huge fan of industry and loved the story of how the Titanic was built. So, we knew some type of gift would be a fantastic way to show we valued his invitation to host us in Memphis. (More about this later). Does it sound like we knew what you were doing?
This was our first business. How do we make a good first impression?
Are you a boyband?
What do you do when you need to make a good first impression? For us, we needed to look the part. (Youthful exuberance). We didn’t have access cash to go on a shopping spree for suits, but what we did have was the brother in law of Liam, who was a manager in a men’s clothing store. Bonus! Not thinking that we were going to one of the hottest cities in America we went full out on 3 piece suits. Rookie mistake. But, we did look sharp.
The day had arrived when we needed to travel. I spoke to Liam and Gerard and said what about the suits? Are we packing them in luggage or carrying them? We didn’t want to get them wrinkled! We had 2 planes to catch including a stop-over. So, the suits were now part of our shadows.
As we boarded the flight in Belfast we said to the air hostess “where do we put these suits”? We didn’t want to fold them in over-head compartments. (Brass neck crew). To our amazement, she took them and put them in with the air cabin crew’s storage! We could now sit back for our flight to Newark. The plane journey was fine, a couple of beers always helps. When we landed we had a stop-over before catching our connection to Memphis.
As we made our way to get our connection some people from Belfast noticed Gerard. They started talking, and as we moved up beside them with the suits over the shoulder they asked; “are you a boyband”? Gerard could have made the cut, he was a handsome brother. Liam and I would have made good back-up singers! Everyone has their flaws.
The double bed and Sir stiff back.
When we opened the door to the hotel room there was one double bed and 3 of us! In all the excitement to get the accommodation booked, we didn’t pay attention to sleeping arrangements. Instead of contacting the front desk and requesting a pull out bed, we improvised. There was a large velvet chair. You know the type you find in some hotel rooms, which sits slightly upright, and is very comfortable if you want to enjoy a coffee. The plan was to rotate every night, so no one’s sleep was ruined.
Before the night was out, one of them (not saying which one) made the grand announcement that he likes to sleep in the nude. Say no more gents that chairs mine for the duration of this trip! You boys can do the one sleeps under/over covers routine. We were meeting the owners the next day of the manufacturers we wanted to partner with. I usually wake early in the morning, but this morning wished I hadn’t.
The naked butler was lying above the covers! Not a sight you want to witness first thing in the morning. When I got up from the chair I felt as stiff as a board, so much for small mercies.
“If you’re working on something you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed. The vision pulls you” (Steve Jobs)
The breakfast of champions
We all got washed put on some clothes and went down for breakfast. The sounds, smells, and sights of Memphis were intoxicating. I never had my senses attacked in so many ways all at once. The aroma from freshly made cinnamon scones, coffee, bagels, syrup, and fresh fruit was like heaven. The accents of staff with the softly spoken southern lilt just made you feel happy to be alive. We could have sat there all day just chatting and eating. But there was work to be done, and we needed to prepare. After consuming all we could eat we went back to our rooms to go over what we needed to say during this initial meeting. After going over who was taking what part of the conversation, there was only one thing left to do; let’s get those 3 piece suits on! Unbelievable there wasn’t a wrinkle on them.
Titanic and David Hasselhoff
We exited the lift into the hotel lobby with 3 piece suits on in 35-degree heat. If we were going for first impressions sweaty foreheads were par for the course. We sat down in the hotel lobby waiting for Dave (owner of the company) we sought to partner with. The man walked into the hotel with one of his team. He was about 6ft 3inches solid frame (former amateur boxer) tanned skin with silver hair and a matching moustache. He was wearing shorts a muscle vest and sandals. The man wouldn’t have looked out of place in Baywatch!
We exchanged pleasantries and started talking about our plans. At this point, all is going swimmingly. Dave invites us to spend the day with him and his team so we can build a relationship with them. We get up and I lift the gift we bought for him back in Belfast (remember he like Titanic). We had this amazing story that the image which was now in a frame was one of the originals painted in 1912. What a bunch of blaggers!
Now, this would have cost a small fortune, and they can only be bought at auction. As I was telling Dave the story while standing next to him, holding the frame, the boys noticed the price tag of £18 on the back. Jesus, that’s a bargain for a collector’s item. We ran a diversion Tom Brady would have been proud of to get the frame down onto Liam’s knee. Why? We needed to frantically remove the price tag before Dave knocked us all out! Mission complete. There is one other thing says Dave before we go to lunch. What’s that? “Get those fucking suits off your in Memphis”! Lesson learned.
Hurricanes and crocodile tails
After what can only be described as a scene from Friends (Ross and the leather pants), we were in the streets of Memphis ready to meet Dave and his team for lunch. We all sat down, and the waitress who from memory was the friendliest person I have ever met in a restaurant asked; “are you ready to order drinks”?
At this point, Dave says “do you want to try a hurricane” to us three? Not one to turn down any type of alcohol I said I would happily try one (When in Rome). The hurricane was a tall glass with smoke coming out of the top. We sipped over them during starters which consisted of crocodile tails. Never had them before in my life, but they were tasty.
The main course arrived and Dave said let’s get some more hurricanes! Sounds like a plan. After what seemed like an hour (was 3 hours) we finished our meal and were ready to settle up and go outside. What Dave failed to mention is that the hurricanes leave you feeling lucid in your mind, but your legs are drunk! So, a simple 10-yard walk resembles Cristiano Ronaldo’s step-overs. Did I say he was a wise man!
However, there was business to be done, and as we were slightly intoxicated we were acting like crutches for each other as we walked. Memphis has a thriving jazz quarter, and the sounds, dancing, and warmth of the place is something you need to experience. Is there anywhere else that sells hurricanes?
The blocked toilet and iron claw
If you want to measure the test of real friendship, then don’t try this! It was the day after the night before and I awoke with a hangover Ed Helms would have been proud of. The two amigos were still sleeping and I needed to go to the bathroom. Upon entering the toilet was blocked. It was clear one of the amigos had got up in the middle of the night and not flushed the toilet. I went backed into the room and asked who went to the toilet and didn’t flush (not to finger point) I won’t say who the culprit was.
However, now we had a problem. Instead of calling maintenance to unblock the toilet (too embarrassing), we had to think of another way. For those that have fixed a blocked toilet before, you simply get a mop, place a plastic bag over the head, and plunge to unblock. Sounds easy. We had no mop! So, I did what all good friends would do in that situation, I place the bag over my hand (you know the rest). No need for Dyno-rod. The toilet is now in usage. Did I say this is how friendships are tested and forged!
Golf with Mr fat feet
We had arranged to play a game of golf with Dave’s business partner Kevin. The golf course was amazing with large houses in certain parts of the course. I didn’t play golf at that stage, so took the cart and filled the cooler with Budweiser’s! The cart provided some much need shade from the 35-degree sun, which was something I never experienced before. How the boys and Kevin walked around the course was a feat of human endurance. I always stayed nearby so they could grab some refreshments from the cooler.
After about 2 hours, and drinking in the sun, I started to feel a bit tipsy, so the driving became a bit more erratic! It was a welcomed relief when the game was finished, as I was getting to the DUI stage! The boys tallied their points and made their way to the clubhouse to return their clubs. I drove the cart to the parking spaces provided. As I jumped out of the cart, I felt a pain shoot up both my legs. I looked down and my feet resembled something out of swamp thing.
Driving around in the cart while sipping on the odd beer or two I failed to realise the sun was shining on my feet, which were now suffering from 3rd-degree burns. On top of that, they had swollen to twice their size. Luckily I was wearing sandals as I was never getting a pair of trainers on. The pain for the next 2 days was excruciating, as was the fact the rest of my legs were milk white! I started playing golf when I returned to Belfast though. The most frustrating game in the world!
“Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out” (John Wooden)
Elvis and Cheers
The day before we were due to return to Belfast we went to visit both the original home of Elvis and Graceland. The difference was hard to fathom, but that’s what success can bring for those who reach their dreams. We visited the museum where his many cars and plane are housed all facilitated by Dave the owner of the company we were now partners with. Reflecting on my time with the man he was one of those men you meet who you know you will never forget.
The man was humble, kind-spirited, family orientated, and a real force. He had invited us into his world, and I am thankful for his time, patience, and energy in Memphis. We packed our suitcases, this time the suits went in as well, and set off for Belfast. During the stop-over in Newark, we sat in one of the bars and spoke about what we wanted to do when we returned. We had so many ideas, plans, and dreams it would be hard to explain them all in this story. I could have sat there all day and listened to all the various accents (it was like an episode of Cheers). But it was time for this journey to end. Next stop Belfast!
